Today is Sunday (or at least it was when I first wrote this!) which means it is match day. Having 2 girls and no real interest in football myself I never imagined I would be spending cold Sunday mornings cheering on my daughter from the side lines. Victoria has a few hobbies typical of girls her age (swimming and dance being two) so why football? Put simply, girls are complicated and boys are simple so Victoria has always found it easier to interact with boys at school. And boys love playing football.
It may sound facetious or sarcastic but the female of species is far more complicated than us blokes, especially at primary school age. Most girls Victoria’s age have social circles built around common interests, are starting to get interested in boys, their bodies are changing and along with that comes hormones and emotions. And this is a world that Victoria and those like her simply doesn’t understand. So it is far easier for her to interact with boys playing football on the playground than try to deal with complex social structures.
When Sutton Dynamo FC set up their first all-girl football team we worried that she wouldn’t be able to play. Would she be any good compared to her peers? Would she get picked for the team? Would she struggle with the rules and pace of the game? It’s only that latter part that came true. She is very much an equal within the team, playing every week, albeit for shorter periods than the others at times. But she does struggle with the pace of the game. She is very much a visual learner so an enthusiastic dad shouting “down the line” means nothing to her. It takes her longer than most to understand positioning, have the confidence to tackle and most of all she is completely unable to foresee what will happen next in order to be in the correct position at the right time. But that will come.
We are very grateful to Mark, Nick, Dave and the rest of the team and parents for the support they give Victoria week in week out because the important thing for all of the girls at this stage is that they enjoy it. And although she may get upset and frustrated when she doesn’t think she has done well, she genuinely loves being part of the team, something we would never have expected a few years ago.
So I guess the overall point of this post is two-fold. If your child is into something outside of the norm, embrace it. Nothing to do with autism and everything to do with child happiness. And secondly, if you run a club, activity or group, think about how inclusive it really is.
Time to sort out the kit bag…
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